Tough Decisions As A Parent

There are some decisions that we have to make as a parent that are so tough.  Let me play out a conversation that recently occurred between Kyser and I as we were pulling up to Lacrosse practice...........

Kyser: "Mom, what is Fag Football?"

Mom: "Excuse me?"

Kyser: "What is Fag Football?"

Mom: "Can you please explain further why you are asking that question?"

Kyser: "One of my coaches told me that the reason we didn't have practice here last week is because the field was being used for Fag Football.  What even is a fag?"

Mom: "Two things.  First, a fag is a derogatory way to refer to a gay person.  Second, which coach said that because  I need to go talk to him."

Kyser: "No mom, please do not talk to him because I will get in trouble and get kicked off the team.  Mom you have to promise me that you won't go say anything to him!"

Mom: "Kyser you understand that it is very inappropriate for a grown adult to be speak to 10-12 year old boys like that right and that you cannot get kicked off the team because I spoke to the coach about this."

Kyser: "Yes mom I understant but that coach will be meaner to me and I won't get to play as much."

Herein lyes my dilemma.  In my heart, I am so upset that a coach would think it's ok to speak this way around children.  And for that fact, I want to go have a serious conversation with him to discuss my disgust.  However, I do not want to upset Kyser in a way that would cause him to stop communicating with me.  I have worked extremely hard to get my kids to open up and ask questions when they have them.  And my Kyser is the quietest one and does not often open up, so if the coach were to say something to him after speaking with me, it could be a huge blow to the communication process.  So, as of this moment I am still undecided to handle the situation.  I am hoping the answer will just come to me one of these days..............